BICster

At BIC, blogging and thinking about BIC.

Such a great day, although I miss having Paulina around. And I need to get used to not having her around, since she might be moving on to other things come January- if I continue being at BIC. My life was a little higher on the stress register these weeks, what with the back pains (and pangs of fear of cancer. uh, yah) and the PiLA/PiA fellowship applications. What relief having both causes done with :) and coming with working through the applications was the realization that I do want to work in the field. I want to, I need to.

I adore the policy-level work that I am dabbling in now at BIC, and it is incredible to get to understand what makes policy happen and decision-makers tick. While I have been able to engage and contribute to this work-- I read documents, attend meetings, participate in strategy sessions, and know whats going on-- I feel like I am still inadequate, I suppose on a philosophical level. Without knowing the reality of how an indigenous person's right is violated, I can't advocate for their right to participation all that legitimately. I need to see how environmental assessments are conducted, or how infrastructure projects lead to relocation, because if not, it seems like all my claims are pulled from the air and will thus fall on soft, feeble ground. That's one reason why I like this work so much: in order to be effective, you need to connect, and thus empathize, ground realities with power dynamics and the language of an office of tecnocrats. So you bascially need to have your act together and be good at everything. That's all.

So the realization is that I should leave, after June 26, 2012, take to the field, un-detach myself from headquarter-landia in DC and see what things are like in the field. Brazil, Peru, Timor, Laos, Nepal. Ah, after talking to Edward (ex-PiLa fellow at ACA) I am intimidated and already frustrated about how things work in the field, but I think I need to go. I probably say that with a pinch of idealism, and will be hating on myself once I'm there, but yeah I should. If God would open a door.

Wow, is it normal that people in the office are concerned about an intern's future? I have a whole bunch of people asking me for updates occasionally on how my applications have gone, etc. Feels nice to know that people care, or that they like having me as part of the organization. I do think I have made pretty good connections with the BICsters. There's the intern/below-28s group, then the forest group (of men). I love both, love being part of both.

I learnt an important lesson today: do not reveal visa status to prospective employers until last possible moment. Learning this lesson late has cost me a star opportunity i.e. the very hard way, so yes, I definitely know better now. As for star opportunities, I pray another will come my way soon...

So Ecosystem Marketplace has offered me the Carbon Program intern position- which I will accept. Today. And then comes my story that I will tell with semi-embarassment. So yesterday, Josh came by our office and asked if Christian and I brought lunch, and we did, so he went: shoot, I'll go see what trucks there are today. Well known fact = I really like Josh, so I was thinking about that and decided I would not bring food today so as to try getting lunch with him. So today, I went by his office and asked if he had eaten. And he had, so I went back to get my stuff to go to the trucks...a little disappointed, but I had expected it. And then lo and behold, Josh comes by me with his cap and jacket on, ready to go out, and says he wants to get something sweet (YAY! time with Josh! i.e. to absorb from his wisdom experience and kindness which I so admire). So we head down, and in the lift talk about his recovering from pneumonia. Then he says, "I wanted to talk to you about something, Alvin reminded me that we have funds for a REDD intern...." And I started to smile to myself (?!), because well Alvin had mentioned this to me the day before, and yesterday I went to talk to Josh to hint and see if he would mention it, but he didn't. Although I did tell him about EM, and he was asking a lot of questions. So when he started talking about it, I was happy/knowing. So anyway, he did say that he would love to hire me, and that the grant wouldn't be confirmed till later in the month but that it was likely. And he went on to ask about whether I had accepted the Ecosystem Marketplace offer. I tried to play it cool the whole time...And I was also honest, i.e. not being completely sure, since I am keen and interested in EM. But since it's part-time, there is a chance there to perhaps be at BIC the other half. I hope this will be how it works out, that I have both. But then there's also the WRI research internship (Asia, energy) that I am keen on. I'm a little torn....I mean, working on REDD with Josh is like a dream come true. And is essentially what I have been doing these past months, maybe its good to get exposure elsewhere? Although if I know that I wanna do REDD and LAC/Asia stuff, this is exactly where it's at! Ayayay.

And I would be working directly under Josh, which in itself is such a plus. LOL I always tell Andrea about Josh-related things, because she understands them, but I think she's getting sian hehe. But honestly, he is a great mentor, and I could not ask for a better supervisor, I don't think. And continuing to be around Paulina (crying face), Vince (!!!!), Jelson, Christian, maybe Nathan?!?!? would be awesome.

I had a great conversation with Milen today, and we empathize so much with each other? We're in very similar situations- although she does have a degree from SAIS. A positive outcome from that convo was that we want to talk to Alvin about how to better manage the interns/plan a proper internship program that would be beneficial for both the interns and BIC. We'll talk again soon, and I hope we get to leave something valuable behind at BIC when we leave.

BIC HOLIDAY PARTY this Thursday!!!! Woot woooooot